Reaching For Heaven
May 3rd, 2006 by Travis Swan | Posted in Ministry Philosophy, Theology
(Posted on behalf of Mitch Majeski, one of the pastors at Summitview Community Church. -Travis)
As I attempted to worship today a profound sense of my frailty overwhelmed me – and then, indescribable gratitude. I say “attempted” because I literally could not muster the words – suddenly they seemed too holy, too pure for me, a man of unclean lips. With tears and faint whisper my small worship poured out and I felt pure joy.
This is a rare experience for me and often only happens in periods of tremendous emotional upheaval. I am left, then, to ask the question “do I really get it?”
Philippians 2:12-13 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13 FOR IT IS GOD who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. [emphasis added]
When I come to worship do I believe the words I sing? I would have to say, on most occasions, I don’t. This is not an attempt at some spiritual self-deprivation to create righteousness through penance; it is just the plain truth of my shallow, lightweight existence. If I truly believed these words:
Psalm 36:5-6 Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. 6 Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,
your justice like the great deep.
it would seem that I should be shook by their purity, supremacy and holiness. And, it would seem, that I should feel a grave gratitude for the opportunity to even utter them, that nothing short of tears, fear and trembling would accurately reflect. I fear that most of my worship is trifling with the holiness of God. Thankfully that was not the case today and thankfully an awestruck fear and trembling led me to that glorious place of self-forgetfulness (losing my life) and satisfying worship of Christ (finding my life).
I wonder if we are so self-conscious that we simply refuse to let our thoughts ascend to that high and holy place which would solicit a tender, trembling response of grateful worship. We aren’t comfortable with that lose of control, that exposure of our needy frailty, so we contrive a worship posture that allows us to appear religious and safely sing them aloud (even sometimes with vigor). I have learned the abominable art of “worshipping” without letting the truth crack my steady, self-sufficient heart into a million quivering pieces. What other explanation could there be? Are these not the most beautiful and profound truths in the Universe? Has beauty ever stirred you to silent tears? Then indeed EVERY worship service, as it is proclaiming something of infinitely greater stature, should move us to some sort of fear and trembling. If it does not, then we have not fully grasped the greatness of God and the spectacle of the Gospel and our worship is incomplete and small.
Let us fear the desire of our flesh to appear dignified – to be in control of our response to God. It is a deceitful trickery. Every recorded encounter with God solicited an uncontrolled, knee-jerk response of worship, which, according to the Revelation, continues for eternity and becomes the substance of joy for all who share community with God.
Which brings my thoughts to the practice of lifting hands. Why do we do it? Indeed it is prescriptive:
Psalm 134:2 Lift up your hands in the sanctuary and praise the LORD.
but, if we can tread into the territory of presumption for a moment, why does God call us to this act?
Psalm 143:6 I stretch out my hands to You; My soul longs for You, as a parched land. Selah.
There is a futility in the act. Are we reaching for God? – for Heaven? When I realized how short my heart fell from grasping the greatness of whom I worship, raising my hands made sense.
The truth of the matter is that I may never “get it” when it comes to worship on this side of heaven. God is so beautiful, so gracious and so powerful – His greatness is all consuming. My heart is too small, my flesh too resistant to total surrender – but yet there is a flickering of worship that must be expressed. So like a baby bird confined to its nest, helpless, frail and, yet, reaching for food from its mother – I stretch my hands to God. I can’t reach heaven with my hands, but with them I can express that therein stirs a desire (however small) to be there worshipping God in true, self-forgetful, trembling joy.
When faced with my limitations to true worship, I have two options. The first is to contrive a set of actions that characterize “true worship” and perform. The second is to acknowledge my inability to fully appreciate God and humbly continue with the act. That is gospel living. God must come further to us than we do to Him – even in our worship. The beauty of the arrangement is that my imperfect understanding ceases to be an obstacle to a perfect surrendered worship.
Oh may my desire for God grow! May my tenderness towards God increase and may every worship service leave me desperately reaching for a God I cannot grasp. Here God is glorified and, in trembling tears, I am satisfied.
Originally posted on New Heart’s Sojurn by Mitch Majeski
This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 3rd, 2006 at 2:05 pm and is filed under Ministry Philosophy, Theology. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Fantastic blog. I have been pondering many of the same issues with participating in a worship team. I am continually challenged with our call to holiness. Check Eph. 5 and Romans 6 along with Hebrews 12:14. I think the evangelical church (and it’s worship leaders/teams) should really do frequent self-examination to see if their motives are correct as well as guarding against the encroachment of things like a performance mentality and anything that would deter us from the passionate pursuit of God’s holiness. As mortal, frail husks on this side of eternity, we wrestle with things like God’s infinite love, mercy and grace. Live for that day! Rock and and jam for the Lamb. Dean
Wow! I need to get this into a reading for my church. This is exactly what worship IS and what it is not! I love this and man you are hitting the heart of my hearts and the flesh is trembling! You are after the Lord with EVERYTHING! Abandoned to His Holiness and unafraid to shout that you are unworthy and He is ALL. I am in tears as I read this rejoicing at the power of God seen thru your eyes. What a blessing! Thank you brothers and thanks for this site! Open and Honest hearts seeking to find ways to Love God just Love Him for all that we can and do have.